By Ashley Toland Editor

OK. This is what everyone can seem to agree on about downtown parking. The current system is a mess and needs drastic overhaul.

Anyone who lives or works downtown didn’t need a formal study to tell them this tasty tidbit, but numbers are always nice and on June 24, the Downtown Mobile Alliance released the results of Urban Place Consulting Group’s findings on what the perceptions and realities of downtown parking really are.

While the perception is that currently there is an inoperable tumor that has metastasized all over the Barry Bonds Loop and is killing it, the reality is more like a pimple – it’s a definite blemish on the face of downtown, but with the proper treatment, it will go away. But it’s certainly going to leave a scar or at least a mild discoloration for a few years.

So disgusting.

Almost as disgusting as 58 percent of downtown residents and business people rating “the downtown parking experience at less than acceptable.”

Which is totally unacceptable.

We’ve all had our horror stories. First it was the Parking Nazis, who stalked meters so zealously if you weren’t back the second the meter expired, you didn’t have a prayer of escaping an offensively neon green ticket placed under your windshield wiper.

But there was a strong public outcry, so the city replaced the Nazis with retired cops in early 2005, which was supposed to be better. Turned out it was one of those “be careful of what you wish for” situations.

From stories of an elderly lady’s Little Rascal being ticketed to a Virginia tourist whose vehicle was ticketed while he was standing outside of his car jut looking at a map, these guys were either directed to be exceptionally cranky or we just happened to find the most bitter retirees in the entire MPD – especially CE52. They’re not allowed to give out their names. I’m assuming because of fear they will be harmed, which sort of makes the point for this whole column. I should just stop now and go on to Callaghan’s.

OK, OK. Fine. I’ll write some more.

There are problems beyond attitude. Let’s just say if downtown parking were a kid, judging by its report card, it would ride the short yellow bus. There were 11 areas examined and rated by the consulting group, a failing grade was given in each category, save two – “revenue control and enforcement technologies,” which passed and “consistent enforcement,” which was only given a neutral.

The report summarized the report card by saying, “Historically there has been no parking leadership or centralized planning and management structure to the Downtown Mobile parking system. Previous parking and demand studies have been performed, but no real public action has been undertaken as a result of those studies. While state enabling legislation allows for the creation of public parking authorities, the City of Mobile never exercised its right to create such an organization. The City staff person with the greatest amount of direct parking knowledge passed away in 2005, leaving behind a knowledge and responsibility vacuum. Among the remaining city staff responsible for parts of parking, there is confusion as to who is responsible for managing the Central Parking contract.”

Currently Central Parking collects the revenue and signs the retired officers’ checks. Apparently the police department hires and fires them, but really has no control over their training or disciplinary matters – even though Central Parking directs people to call the police department if there is an issue.

The confusion is something Chief Phillip Garrett says is a definite problem that needs to be addressed and he hopes to see a major change in the system.

“The problem is they (the officers) are serving two masters. Who are you going to listen to? The guy who is signing your check – that’s who. We can hire them or fire them but I don’t sign their checks. They’re not going to listen to me,” Garrett said.

He said if it were up to him, he would just take all of the meters down. But acknowledging that will probably not happen, he said he hopes to see “consistent, reasonable enforcement” back under the control of the Mobile Police Department, much like it was before Central Parking took over. He said that would have the added safety bonus of having uniformed officers walking the streets.

“I get more calls and complaints about downtown parking than just about anything else. I’m tired of being blamed,” he added.

Another problem addressed in the study is a lack of clear signage and markings of loading and fire zones. I was personally bitten by this one recently. I was ticketed in front of Government Plaza for being in a fire zone, when I thought I was in media parking, but when I went back t o look at it to see if I was, the red stripe looked like it was last painted in 1969, so I really have no idea now.

But regardless, if you’re going to zealously enforce these zones, then they ought to be zealously maintained. Which of course is the city’s responsibility, but Central Parking’s job to enforce it. Such a mess.

Mayor Jones’ chief of staff Al Stokes said the administration is currently reviewing the study and the process, especially considering Central Parking’s contract is up in September, but he said, “we haven’t made a decision yet. Right now, our options are wide open. We are awaiting recommendations from Chief Garrett.”

I have a few recommendations of my own.

1. Do not renew Central Parking’s on-street contract, eliminate the “two masters” problem. That’s never going to go away if it continues as it is now.

2. As Chief Garrett recommended, put it all back under the city’s purview – maintenance, enforcement, collection.

3. Buy some paint damnit and make sure all of the loading and fire zones are clearly marked.

4. If the same officers are kept, massive retraining to be more customer service oriented and mandatory daily doses of Prozac.

Most of these same recommendations were made by the study – well, not the Prozac – but if we all work together to make these changes we can put the first dab of Clearasil on the pulsating pimple that is currently downtown parking.

Ashley Toland is Lagniappe editor. Contact her at ashleytoland@lagniappemobile.com.

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