Mobile Magnified

The chili bowls are as empty as our social calendars and a feeling of woe has taken over city. Maybe it’s not that bad. And I do have some good scoop from the chili cook-off and some leftover Mardi Gras and “Extreme Home Makeover” gossip, so all is not dark and gloomy. And Saint Patrick’s Day is coming up too, not to mention the Miss Loretta anniversary show for all you Fruit Loopers,. Woe schmoe. It’s Mobile. We always have fun.

Mardi Gras leftovers

Apparently this was the year of ball brawls. We reported a couple of issues ago about a slug fest at one of the stuffier organizations, involving a woman and her ex and current beau. Apparently the society lady was not the only chick stirring things up. At another slightly less stuffy ball, a Boozie spy witnessed yet another crazy altercation.

Our spy reported, “these two guys got into it over a woman (of course). The funny thing is that one of the brawler’s friends came up and ushered him away to behind the reserved bleachers to let him recuperate and calm him down. Well, the girlfriend of the other guy followed them behind the bleachers and started wailing on the guy who had just been ushered off. He then declared that he doesn’t hit women, so he took every lick this chick dished out and ended up in the fetal position on the floor with her kicking and punching him while he’s screaming, ‘I ain’t gonna hit a woman!’”

So chivalrous! King Felix would be proud.

Extreme Home Makeover

The only thing we really have to add to this is we hear they had their wrap party at The Greater Gulf State Fairgrounds, which is a little odd, I thought. But as Boozie was informed after she wrote a snarky thing about the mayor’s annexation party being there last year, they do have a very lovely VIP room. OK, sounds good. Just wanted to make sure Ty was happy. Judging from the pic the Veet’s ladies sent us from his time at their bar, he did.

Chili Cook-off

Saturday, Feb. 23 started off dark and dreary and a little chilly, but it turned out to be a gorgeous day and everyone flocked to Bienville Square for this year’s Chili Cook-off.

My personal favorites were the Sheriff’s department, ReBath and Rockwell Kaufman’s, but I must admit I didn’t sample even half of them.

One of the judges told me one team had a real special ingredient, as he was sampling all of the various chilis, he found a pubic hair. Yummy! No other pubic hair sightings were reported.

I also overheard this conversation, apparently between two friends, one Republican and one Democratic.

Democrat: The Mobile Republican party just tried to give me some of their chili. I told them I didn’t eat Republican chili.

Republican: Well I don’t know why not. It’s free and they’re giving it out, so isn’t it really Democratic chili?

Democrat: (Rolls eyes).

Afterwards, folks descended upon Boo Radley’s, Heroes, Hayley’s and Callaghan’s. It was a madhouse and many were passing out by 4 p.m. Others made it to The Bike Shop until about 10 p.m., but it was not pretty.

Janet Jackson/Miss Loretta anniversary gala

All of my gays are giddy about being down at The Fruit Loop this weekend. Friday, Feb. 29, B-Bob’s is having a Janet Jackson CD release party. Hey at least it’s not Britney.

And Saturday, March 1 “Miss Loretta” the B-Bob’s drag queen who is known as the “good girl” promises she is going to get “bad” at her “12th Year Anniversary Party.” And my Fruit Loop spies say she has commemorative snow globes. Boozie must have one of those.

Speaking of drag queens . . .

“Miss Venus,” who regularly performs at B-Bob’s, needs your help. Someone stole her trunk full of dresses, wigs and make-up a couple of weeks ago. The poor thing had to perform in a choir robe the other night and sang “His Eye His Own the Sparrow.” Not exactly your typical drag queen song selection. I hear a benefit is in the works.

Saint Patrick’s Day x 2

Every year, folks have had to make the difficult choice on St. Patrick’s Day – do I go to Paddy O Toole’s or Callaghan’s or try to do both? Decisions, decisions. Well, this year, you don’t have to choose because Callaghan’s is having their celebration on Saturday, March 15, while Paddy’s will keep theirs on March 17. So you may want to buy two green shirts this year.

Well kids, that’s all I got. Just remember, whether rain or shine, dramatic or scandalous, or just some plain ol’ pubic hair chili lovin’, I will be there. Ciao.

Boozie Beer Nues is Lagniappe social butterfly. Contact her at boozie@lagniappemobile.com.

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