County View

At the March 10, 2008 County Commission meeting Parsons Brinckerhoff, Inc. was authorized to conduct a $50,000 community needs assessment of District 1, north Mobile County. Naturally I commandeered the proceedings and argued the county should write me a check for only $5K and I would camp out in NoMo and produce a 200-page study called: “Community Assessment Needs and Recommendations for North Mobile County, Alabama.”

I will engage such flowery language as, “In examining the community as a whole, the researcher found a great need for stronger commercial presence, such as major department stores and restaurants, acting not only as a stimulus to encourage a more robust environment, but also as razzle-dazzle for employment in the district.”

“It was determined that a boisterous program to improve structural infrastructure in many areas of the aforesaid district would therefore mobilize commercial growth and serve as an incentive to community owners for self-improvement programs of individual housing structures.”

Now, you try it.

Never mind I don’t have 115 years experience and 150 offices worldwide like the other PB , but I’m cheap, smart and I once ate escargot on a fancy cracker just to say I’ve eaten a gutted snail.

No Easy Rider

More Americans were killed in motorcycle accidents in one year, than total American military personnel killed in Iraq in five years. Maybe that’s why local motorcycle instructor Freddy Wheeler has for seven years been waging a war for a motorcycle safety course, asking help from the County.

The Department of Transportation says 4,810 people in the U.S. died in motorcycle accidents in 2006. DOT also say motorcyclists are 35 times more likely than car occupants to die in a crash.

Mr. Wheeler, who spoke at the March 10 meeting, has been trying to rev-up attention of county officials to provide an outdoor space for motorcycle safety training. The Motorcycle Training Foundation, where Mr. Wheeler is an instructor, and the Alabama Motorcycle Safety Program will provide instructors and all else if the county will provide outdoor space for the training.

Although the commissioners did not high-five Mr. Wheeler’s suggestion, they did listen, there was dialogue and they agreed to possibly work with him on securing a location. How about some training for lane swerving car drivers too? Objects you don’t see in your mirror could be real live human beings on motorcycles.

Seafood, not Peefood

Sophisticated urbanites give little or no thought to sewer or septic, but people living outside the city limits, in Mobile County, do. Two passionate women made their case against the location of a new sewer treatment plant in Bayou la Batre.

Randi Purvis and Barbara Reid ask the county to intervene against a second facility on Portersville Bay, claiming the current one is sub-standard and greatly exceeds allowed discharge overflow into South Mobile County waters, tainting local seafood among other stinky things. Using history as a teacher the new plant, they say, would likely produce the same problems, especially if damaged by a hurricane.

Purvis and Reid told the county commissioners that Mobile Water & Sewer indicated a trunk line could possibly be run to Bayou la Batre, connecting them with the Mobile system.

Casi Callaway of Mobile Baykeeper says the existing treatment plant in Bayou la Batre was damaged by Katrina and has never been in compliance. The new plant would be just due east of the existing plant, and only about 1,500 feet off the water. “The location is irresponsible,” she told Lagniappe.

Bayou la Batre’s city clerk referred Lagniappe to grant writer, Janey Galbraith of Galbraith and Associates for their side of this debate. Two messages left with assistants of Ms. Galbraith were not returned by press time.

Lagniappe columnist George Crozier, a doctor in biology, has also been following this issue.

“I do not think that there has been adequate discussion of alternatives that might be available to the community in the form of decentralization of the system or use of the effluent on the local golf course as is done on the Baldwin County coast,” said Dr. Crozier. “The proposed site is absolutely at storm risk and there is little reason to continue disposal into the east end of Portersville Bay.”

And what about suggestions for trunk lines?

“I am not really enthusiastic about the concept of running sewer all the way from the MAWSS system because that would clearly stimulate development and consequent habitat loss throughout,” Crozier said.

Commission president Steve Nodine said the city should not be in the sewer business and other cities such as Semmes and Wilmer would want trunk lines as well.

There’s already litigation in progress with the existing plant – Mobile Baykeeper v. Bayou la Batre, and one might expect future suits of law should plans proceed with a new treatment plant in the unpopular proposed location.

County Gov Week

April 6-12 is National County Government Week, begun in 1991. Teachers, this might be a good time to get the kids out of the classroom and visit Government Plaza, perhaps mingle with county officials. Don’t know if any festivities are planned but my idea to buy the three commissioners roundtrip tickets to Citronelle was thwarted when Delta said sorry, we don’t fly there. How rude.

Laudations

Mobile County has a brand new Public Information officer and her name, Dena Pollard, is now public information. Congratulations Dena.

Also ran, or running like hell

Dope to un-trepreneurs who prefer to operate meth labs and other non-traditional biz and activities under the cover of dark: the Sheriff’s Dept. now has SuperVision, a tactical kit that was approved at 29K. Translated: they can now see that faded blue flame tattoo on Candy Sue’s upper butt, hundreds of yards away in the pitch of black.

And don’t bother boarding up the windows either, SuperVision has the ability to penetrate through such mundane objects – and walls and doors to. Or is that Superman? I don’t remember.

Contact Preston Brady at preston@lagniappemobile.com.

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