Sweet Baby New Year!!

Crawford Binion, a partner in Hummingbird Advertising

– We reach a dubious milestone where one-third of Americans over 18 have appeared at least partially nude on the Internet.

– “Gangsta Country” becomes a Grammy category.

– In a failed attempt to attract the 18-39 demographic, the new Pope teams with Apple and introduces I-God, where one can download Bible passages.

– Shula finally beats Tuberville and raises one finger in celebration, and it’s not his index finger.

– In an attempt for clemency, Freeman Jockisch adopts a prison nickname of “Pookie” and writes children books warning them about the dangers and temptations of county politics.

Crawford , 9, is a 3rd grade student at St. Paul’s Episcopal School. When his Gameboy is pried from his hands, he enjoys following sports of all kinds, and plays baseball and soccer.

– That he will turn 10-years-old.

– The South will win the Senior Bowl.

– The Baybears will still stink.

– There will be more Mexican restaurants closer to his house.

– Everyone will figure out that “Mobile” means “mobile homes.”

Mayor Sam Jones, served as Mobile County Commissioner for 18 years before before being elected Mayor of Mobile in 2005

– Carnival will resume sailing out of Mobile, and we will get our second cruise ship.

– The University of South Alabama will begin construction on the new Cancer Center.

– The developers of the proposed riverfront condominium, retail and entertainment complex will close on the CSX property at Dow Landing and begin construction.

– Construction will begin on the EADS engineering facility at the Brookley Complex.

– The City of Mobile’s Strategic Plan will be completed and presented to the citizens of Mobile.

Peter Albrecht ,Anchor, WPMI TV-15 evening news

– Alabama announces that students will do nothing but take standardized tests, year round, to comply with federal “No Child Must Learn Anything” guidelines .

– Mobile’s litter and trash problem becomes so bad that swarming seagulls overtake the city. The city’s name is changed to Bodega Bay.

– After getting 5 percent of the vote in the race for county commission, former city councilman Thomas Sullivan immediately announces he’s running for governor.

-Arnold Schwarzenegger’s political career is derailed after Sacramento TV reporter Josh Bernstein reveals that the governor had hidden his ownership of a sprinkler company getting state contracts.

– Trent Lott unexpectedly resigns. Juan Chastang rents a post office box in Vancleave and is appointed U.S. Senator by Mississippi Gov. Haley Barbour.

Matt McCoy , Morning on-air personality on WABB 97-FM

– After a final failed attempt to annex West Mobile into the city, new mayor Sam Jones reinstates and retrains the former downtown Parking Nazis into an elite fighting unit, who then over run WeMo and take it by force.

– The Commish, Steve Nodine, lets it slip that he’s not planning to run for mayor or governor anytime soon, but that he has actually negotiated a deal to take Hugh Hefner’s position as head of Playboy Enterprises. He further explains that all of these years of club carousing and drunken revelry were just training for his new civic responsibilities and that he will appoint WKRG’s Steve Alexander to take his place in his absence.

– Fox 10 finally comes clean that the real John Edd Thompson passed away years ago, and that they have secretly been running pre-recorded hologram images of him, spanning any possible weather conditions, forecasts or emergencies for the last 20 years.

– In an attempt to relieve the constant traffic and congestion on Airport Boulevard, the Department of Transportation announces that they will build additional north and south service roads to connect to the current east and west service roads, separated by traffic humps, lumps, and circles, which will then loop over the newly widened central turning lanes using adjacent on and off ramps, forming a sort of figure-eight thingies that they will suspend from the various large billboards that run along the roadside.

– After the completion of the new Bass Pro Shop shopping center in Spanish Fort, the combined city councils of Daphne, Fairhope, Montrose and Malbis build a large dome over the Eastern Shore, successfully shutting out those “pesky Mobilians.” In response, the City of Mobile announces the RSA Tower was really constructed so that its skyline resembled a large hand with a middle finger pointing east.

Gina Gregory, City Councilperson for District 7 in West Mobile

– There will be two new cruise ships.

– New condos and entertainment venues will begin construction on the river.

– West Mobile will join Mobile.

– Old Shell Road at McGregor will get a facelift.

– Trash will be collected on schedule.

Sandy Matthews , local psychic, Sandy Matthews is a psychic who lives in Wilmer. Schedule a reading with her by calling 251.649.2595.

– Next year, there will be another bad hurricane season. New Orleans will be back but will never be the same. Dauphin Island will get knocked for a loop. I also don’t feel good about the condos to the east of us. Gulf Shores is going to have a hard hit.

– I see a lot of economic stimulation in Alabama. We will lighten up on a lot of issues. Things around education will improve. We will possible have a lottery, and I’m getting the number two around it— maybe in two years.

– The seafood industry will be annihilated from Dauphin Island to Grand Isle, Louis., especially Bayou La Batre and Coden. The word I get is pungent and a rotten feeling. The water will not be able to support good health. I just see nasty, rotten waters—a very dark feeling.

– The new mayor will ruffle feathers, a necessary evil. He will try to breathe new life in the city and gently make changes. I see that he is fair and has a good heart, but he does have some around him who don’t support him. His first year could be difficult.

– Annexation. I pick up that there will be one faction or group who votes to come in and another group that will not.

– Providence Hospital will change hands.

– The airport will hang in there.

– Junior Miss will fizzle. I see a bubble popping. It may also relocate to maybe Atlanta.

– BayFest will continue.

– I don’t feel good about 18-wheelers and the tunnel. No flammable anything needs to be taken through there. I also see another possible pile up on the Bayway, involving fog. People need to watch their speed.

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