Sagittarius (11/22-12/21) ­­— After a meal fit for Robert Effin’ Baratheon, you’ll spend Thanksgiving evening with more regrets than your first marriage. Your Black Friday doorbuster is a multipurpose dry chemical fire extinguisher, in bubblegum pink.

Capricorn (12/22-1/19) — You’ll be forced to Google “antianxiety medication overdose” sometime during the fourth quarter of the Iron Bowl. Your Black Friday doorbuster is dozens of individual elements to build a Rube Goldberg Machine.

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